Headdesk

Let me tell you a story:

The Pharisees are angry.  Jesus is preaching about the Jewish regulations on food and drink.  He is saying that it is not what you eat that makes you unclean, rather what comes out of your mouth (Matt 15:10-11).  Then he provides his disciples with a parable:

“Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be pulled up by the roots.  Leave them: they are blind guides.  If a blind man leads a blind man, both will fall into the pit” (Matt 15:13 – 14)

This is a fairly popular parable, but it is what happens next that struck me.  Peter needs additional clarification.  He asks Jesus to explain and Jesus responds:

“Are you still so dull?” 

Yes, Jesus asks Peter, “Are you still so dull?”  I think that Jesus’ response may be equivalent to the modern day *Headdesk* 

Headdesk

-       verb.  When one’s head connects with a desk expressing frustration or disbelief. 

Perhaps Jesus was a little frustrated that Peter, who had already traveled throughout Israel with him listening to his parables, still needed an explanation.  Sometimes I think Jesus has the same feelings towards my life.  I spent years denying Jesus.  Denying his role as the Son of Man, denying that there even existed a God.  Denying.  And then, even when I started to believe, I fought to keep my will.  I said, “Sure, I will believe in God, but I am still going to do whatever I want!” 

And that’s when Jesus performed the most epic of headdesks.  I can just imagine Jesus, in all his glory, shaking his head and thinking, “Meagan, you know the answer.  You know the way.  Why do you keep fighting it? *Headdesk*”

I’d like to think my life is so different now.  Now that I believe in God.  Now that I believe I have turned my will over to Him, but maybe I am just lying to myself.  I have prayed for answers, and when I didn’t get the answer that I wanted, I would say,

“Lord, I can do this myself.”

And my perfect Father would shake his head and respond,

“Are you still so dull?”